Friday, August 12, 2016

we eat, we drink, we party. Bucharest.

the gang is back together! #canamericanway
"I won’t bullshit you", our host Vlad said when we asked for recommendations for things to do in Bucharest, Romania. Vlad explained that Bucharest is not famous for its museums or other traditional tourist attractions. Go out to eat, he said. Get a drink. Go to the old town after midnight. “That’s what we do in Bucharest. We eat, we drink, we party. And we party better than anyone”.

our movie themed apartment!
So Kari, Kent, Rob, Chris and I headed out to explore the city with Vlad’s candid advice in mind. Old town was only a few minute walk from our door, so we headed there first. The streets of Old Town were winding cobblestone paths, filled with bars, pubs, and restaurants. We ate at a traditional Romanian restaurant where our server recommended a traditional Romanian meal. We learned this meant several dips, breads and cheeses, and our body weight in meat. It was delicious and coma inducing. We spent most of our time in Old Town. It was nice to be in a busy place surrounded by so many eclectic people and still not feel like we stick out in the crowd. 

This was only the first course. 

So we ate. And we also drank. We found Beraria H, the largest beer hall in Europe, just outside the city center. We ordered “beer by the meter”, 11 pints of local brew on a large paddle. Chris, of course, insisted that our server hold the heavy paddle for an extended period of time so he could get a good picture. It turns out we came to the hall the only night this month without live music, so we headed back to Old Town to get our music fix. Because in Old Town after dark, there was live music on every corner.



We also went on a walking tour of Bucharest lead by our Romanian guide, Anka. We learned about local architecture and communist history and the Romani people. But the information that will stay with me forever (and with you, fair reader, because buckle up, it’s about to get gory) was about Vlad the Impaler, aka the inspiration for Bram Stoker’s Dracula. 

See Vlad?
 We learned that Vlad liked impaling so much, he’s rumored to have impaled 23,000 people over 6 years, which math tells us makes about 10 people per day. But it’s the impaling itself that’s really gruesome. Anka explained that a spear was inserted into the criminal’s rectum, then their bodies were rotated upright so that their own weight forced the spear carefully along their spine and out somewhere in their face. If it’s done correctly, it won’t pierce any vital organs and the criminal can survive for a few days like a popsicle. Perhaps the worst detail is that the spear would be rubbed down with pork fat for Muslim criminals in an attempt to insure they would not reach heaven. Woof. And this wasn’t just for the worst criminals. So beware, jaywalkers. The end is near.

the room of requirement, only we didn't need anything. 
This is the speed version of goose and my usual exploration, so we were only able to spend 3 days in Romania, but just like Frank the Tank, we had an AWESOME time! We stumbled upon several book, art and antique sales. We tried 2 traditional liquors and 10 new types of beer.  But in our entire visit we only learned one new word: Noroc, Romanian for cheers! And now, onto Bulgaria! #krumkrumkrum


lovefromkt

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