Amsterdam and Hostile Hostels

Note: This feels like entrapment

Arriving in Amsterdam was a shock to the system as we got in at 1pm local time but our brains still thought it was 6 in the morning. This wouldn't have been a big deal if I had slept on the plane but naturally my time in the air was devoted to watching as many airplane movies as possible, all of which I had already seen but I just couldn't justify watching Legends of the Guardians: Owls of Ga'hoole. Our sleep cycle would never be repaired as staying in a youth hostel is like sleeping with a baby. As soon as you fall asleep some sound jolts you awake and it's often followed by vomiting.

Our roommates were mostly American with the exception of two mystery travelers who talked very little but had great mustaches so I gave them a pass and a boy named Rory from England. Katie kept slowly slipping into his accent when we talked to him. I see this being a major problem in England. The rest were Georgia Tech girls who were studying in Oxford and came to Amsterdam for the weekend to go out clubbing and get high. As they put it: "Lets get some weed brownies and go to Anne Frank." Lovely girls. They also told us that we sounded like "we were from the North". Now I may be incorrect but I'm pretty sure the only people who still call it "the north" are Confederate Generals and I'll be damned if I share a bunk with slavery sympathizers.

We spent most of our time wandering the streets of Amsterdam checking out shops and  markets and eating way too many Doner Kebabs, which are similar to a gyro but they are jammed into a bun instead of pita bread. We rarely had to use a map, thanks to my natural direction skills. I'm kidding of course. It turns out that i rarely know where I am and if it wasn't for Goose I would have fallen into a canal.

Every street has at least 5 lanes of traffic: two for cars, two for bikes, and one for crisscrossing trams, but navigating them was never difficult.  We were out walking for at least five hours every day so naturally we plan on being super buff (buffER in my case) when we get back. On the subject, Amsterdammers are quite fit. There are very few overweight people here. We never saw any homeless people and over four days we saw only three emergency vehicles with their lights on. Apparently they're doing something right here. My guess is on all the roaming dogs without leashes. Also all the prostitutes.


CM